Monday, July 12, 2010
Blogging at last. One more week and I will officially have lived in Accra for 3 whole months. So much have happened since I've last blogged. I've gone through so many emotional highs and lows till at one point I don't recognize that girl in the mirror. But now that the world cup has ended, the booze has run dry, I felt I've really came one full circle and back to where I am and what I want in the first place. Time to do some soul searching once again.
I remembered I left Singapore because of my miserable well-paid job in AH. It was pure desperation that drove me to say 'yes. I'm going Ghana'. I remembered I cried on my first night here, wondering how would I survive one year of 3rd degree worldliness. But as the Ghanaians said, 'You'll get used to it.' And I did. Wondrously...
On one hand, I had a good social life. This is probably the first time I meet different people every week from all over the world. Someone did tell me before that in Ghana, you can't make friends by choice. You make friends because you have to survive or else rot in boredom after work holed up in your room. I am truly thankful that I made good friends and networks although sometimes I really question the means by which we were introduced.
I'm coming to the downside of it all that cause me to question my whole character. In Accra, the only form of entertainment present is clubbing and drinking. I swear I didn't know that I've got slick dance moves in me till now and I certainly am very surprised that I allowed myself to get intoxicated with alcohol every week. I realize one doesn't mind smoke so much when one is drunk. I remembered I couldn't stand the stench of cigarette smoke in Singapore but here it seemed like my nasal senses are somewhat numbed... maybe because half the people around me smoke? Oh... that includes the **** *** whom I ****** - of which it should have never happened had I been sober.
Phew... am glad that I managed to vent it off finally. Gtg now.... bb
4:29 PM
Thursday, May 13, 2010
In a blink of an eye and voila... it's my fourth week in Accra, Ghana. I still find it unbelievable that I managed to travel to two different places (Wli Falls and Winneba) for less than 150 Ghana Cedis (roughly the same as SGD) during the second and third weekend here. And the experience has been awesome. Never in my life have I traveled with such an international mix of people - Dicky from Holland, MariaNO from Mexico, Lydia from Canada and Chris from Poland. Crazy .. but nice people. The 3 hour climb up to the upper Wli Falls with them was challenging, but also fun because you get to see all their 'color' coming out when they are out of stamina. Amazingly enough, I was the fastest person to climb up the steep slopes. I think it's all thanks to the staircase climbing with Jono (Big hug to sis!)
The waterfalls was splendid. There was no one present, only us... so it really felt like our private space. And thank God I bought a waterproof camera so we were able to take pictures in the waterfall. (Pics on facebook) And since no one had access to the internet or any other form of entertainment, we end up playing drinking games (with cards, palm wine and gin). I am quite ashamed to say that I was the only one to get wasted - enough to make me laugh, sing, puke my guts out, cry and yell out 'Fuck you guys.. I hate you for making me drunk.' Oh, the feeling was just horrible. But I'm happy that they took good care of me, making sure I get the alcohol out of my system and guiding me back to my room. Therefore, I was quite surprised that I did not wake up with a hangover at all. In fact, I have never experienced any hangover in my life before - only a slight dehydration. And of course, they were laughing so hard about my drunken state over breakfast and telling me there's more to come.
They were right. We went to Duplex the following Thursday (with Brenda) but I was glad that I did not get myself intoxicated. It was nice that I bumped into Dave and Desmond and their group (Benedict's contact) at Duplex. They were the first group outside AIESEC that I went out to meet by myself in Accra. So happy to see them.
Then we went to Champs (This club- karaoke place) for Lisa's farewell. I drank only the housepour (Vodka Orange) which tasted like 100% OJ and left with Mario and Lisa's two friends from Germany. Too bad we didn't stay long enough to see Dicky and his friend, Nillis get drunk over the microphone. Damm, we could only contend ourself with the details from Canni zzarra.
The weekend at Winneba was a fantastic one, chilling out at a beach. I went with Mario, Dicky and his friend, Nillis who was staying for the weekend in Accra. Never have I traveled with three guys (two of them blonde) before. Needless to say, we obroonis were attracting plenty of attention from the locals. We were accompanied by locals wherever we go. I almost felt embarrassed to strip to my one piece bathing suit with all of them staring at me. Dicky and Nillis played with the local boys in the water. Honestly, I wanted to soak and play with the water too, but I was firstly more concern about our belongings that they do not get stolen (even though Mario was with me) and secondly, I realize that I would attract a whole lot of unwanted attention and company if I were to play in the water as well. (Too bad I'm no social butterfly that day). Still it was fun eating grilled sausages with powered spice and watching the people dance and grovel to Ghanaian music beats.
The taxi ride back to Accra was hell though. It's no fun stuck in small car, sandwiched between two sweaty guys and breathing exhaust gas in a massive jam that lasted 45 minutes. Thank God for the Singapore Government - really... After which, I made my way to the airport to join former capitalgroup interns, Aqua and Romain to send Lisa off. I was supposed to go back home but I ended up staying over with Aqua in Romain's house, which is like the best expatriate house ever. Every room was decorated differently and were fully equipped with air-conditioners. There were proper toilets and a designer kitchen. I had the best sleep there and chatted with Aqua quite a bit in the morning over her experience in Capital group.
Came back home on Sunday and I was refreshed after a good shower. I waited for the toner to arrive for the whole afternoon but it didn't (It came the following Wednesday). However, I made good use of my afternoon by finishing up most of the mentoring program slides. In the evening, went with the guys to Frankies for dinner. I found the milkshake delicious, mainly because I haven't tasted any form of dessert for ages, but it is expensive.
I will be going on a business trip - my first business trip - to Tarkwa, a mining town for training with the Chief and my colleague on the 23rd of May and I will be away for 2 whole weeks. Gawd... Am kind of excited to gain the experience but at the same time I will miss my newfound friends in Accra. I mean half the fun of travelling lies with the fact that one has good company. But I've learnt that time flies very quickly here so I'll be back before I know it.
That's all for now... Rainy season's here and it's effing cold when I take a shower because there's no heater. -_____-
3:30 PM
Friday, April 23, 2010
It's my second day at work and I'm coping thus far. I was presented with my entire work scope just this morning and I felt like fainting. It's thrice as much work compared to my former workplace. A little part of me feels like regretting my decision to leave my comfy job but I guess this is where the rubber meets the road. Work expertise: how capable am I to handle corporate training, content development, operations work and administrative duties and invoicing.
Yesterday I helped out at one corporate customer service training for bankers at a posh hotel thus far. Can't believe that I'll be conducting the training myself in front of working executives soon. Tomorrow am meeting a client with my acting manager; bless him. He's a sweet guy, but I really have trouble understanding his English. He always mumbling. Lord help me... or him. Jesus, I'm trusting you that the meeting will go well tomorrow.
As I'm typing this blog entry, I'm uploading pictures on facebook. I'm so thankful that the electricity is back on, after two blackouts lasting for 10 min each, barely 15 mins ago. Lisa and Carnizara brought me to a bar called Epo last night to watch the UEFA football match between Lyon (France) and Bayern (Germany). Lisa is German, so naturally she would root for the German team. Another intern, called Romaine, who is French was rooting for Lyon because that's where he came from. Interestingly enough, Romaine was the marketing intern working for Capital Group Ghana and he was staying in my room! lol...Am quite relieved to know that someone had previously survived well for 1 year with my present living conditions.
The office after 6pm is pleasant. Like a library. I was finally assigned my work station this morning. It's right at the back of the office, directly underneath the erratic air-con that keeps switching off periodically (I have to keep switching it on every time). For the first time after such a long time, I finally ate my lunch leftovers for dinner. Some sort of Ghanain dish which flavor reminds me of Briyani rice and fried chicken. Surprisingly I'm not as hungry as I was in Singapore. I'm perfectly contented with eating a green apple and a banana for breakfast and dinner respectively. Lunch is now my heaviest meal.
Am feeling excited yet scared... cuz my first business trip out of Accra for a corporate training in supervisory skills is round the corner. It'll be my first time to a gold mine! A GOLD MINE! Honestly I'm curious. I was tasked to prepare the content (loads of powerpoint- they are mad on slides.) But whatever it is, I'm here to take instruction. Just continue to keep me in your prayers and pray that I'm given enough time to pick up and learn the ropes here.
Will be meeting more interns in the upcoming weeks. God help me socialize and learn how to take the Trou Trou (Van: only form of transport which seats 15 people, no air-con) and no external signs that show the bus route - you just have to go figure and guess. I must really learn soon, or else I will really be a hermit. Jesus, help me and give me the courage in walking the busy streets at circle that are only dimly lit with torch lights of various little stands selling all sorts of products. Keep me safe Lord. You are my Hiding Place. I'm glad to say I've survived another day. There's always more than enough grace for the day. =)
2:55 AM
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
So much things have happened since my last entry. Anyway, here is a quick update. My AIESEC internship has been realized. I'm now in Accra, Ghana working for an established consultancy firm as a training officer. My first official day of work starts tomorrow.
Don't ask me why I picked Ghana for my work destination because I sometimes have no idea. I guess the 'crazy' in me just decided to test my limits as a person. (Please don't question that either - it's too late). My flight to Ghana was pretty smooth, no hiccups whatsoever. I transited over at Dubai (yays! Can officially say that I've been there even though it was only about 1 and a half hours). Dubai looks awesome. Would like to work there one day. But enough of lofty dreaming.... I have began my internship proper.
The intern Lisa and the AIESEC coordinator Gideon came to pick me up. Finally got to meet them. Lisa has interned in my company for 8 months and will be going back to Germany in a month's time (So good). My first impression of Accra is that it is damm hot and humid. Temperature was 35 degree Celsius *faints. Though it was not much different from Singapore at it's hottest, air-conditioning is a luxury there. I had to admit that I was slightly perturbed when I beheld my living quarters. It is a small house with four doors looks somewhat dilapidated, with each door leading to a room. My room has a fridge, a ceiling fan, a single bed and pillow (clean bed sheets, pillow cover), a clothing stand and a huge study table with many drawers.
As I had no water, and the room needed sprucing up, Gideon brought me shopping. Honestly, it was the most interesting and worse cab ride ever. The cab had no air-con (expected, so I'll overlook that), the cab-driver was stopped by a policeman who told him that he did not have a license for something. Amazingly, the policeman got into our cab and instructed the cab driver to drive to the nearby police station. Gideon looks nonplussed (Guess it happens frequently) but after wasting 20 mins waiting for the cab driver who was still stuck inside the police station, we got out and took another cab.
The norm is always to bargain before taking a cab. So far Gideon has managed to get a good price for quite a long journey - to Accra mall. But the trip there and back was riddled with traffic jams. We had to wind down the car windows to ventilate the cab but I kept breathing exhaust gas from diesel engines, which gave me a slight headache. Still, better than suffocating myself if the windows are closed.
I changed my money and bought an iron, an electrical fan, canned food, mosquito netting, detergent, cleaning cloths from Accra mall, which looks like a small version of IMM Jurong. Got myself a new telephone number too. We set off for Accra mall around 3 plus pm. We came back to my quarters around 7pm. Most of the time was taken up by the journey.
I was dead tired when I reached my living quarters. Thank God for Gideon who helped me set up my fan and romming for my new SIM card. Surprisingly, even though the water system was down, I adapted well to bathing with scooping cold water from a pail. It's quite refreshing actually. I think my room was damm hot because the door had been shut for quite some time now. But now that I've aired it a bit, it's quite okay. Amazingly, I slept so soundly. Guess I was really really tired.
The sun rose around 5 am plus this morning. For once, I felt quite serene, brushing teeth while gazing at the rising sun. I have already cleaned my room and it can be quite comfortable. I have eaten fried rice for lunch with a colleague at a nearby shack (No kidding). They are going to get me both a resident and work permit for me within the next few days. I'm kinda of looking forward to work actually. Can't wait to see what I'm supposed to do. Am starting to read up on materials.
Glad to say that despite all sorts of feelings, I have survived.
6:31 PM
Sunday, January 31, 2010
It's been ages since you've heard from me... I know... I quit blogging for awhile because of other important priorities. But I can't bear to let go of this blog and let my writing skills rust into dust after my final year project (My thesis was based on Ghost in the Shell 1st and 2nd movies).
How time flies... My uni life seem to have faded away from my consciousness since I graduated last July. All that preoccupies me now is work work work.... it's kinda crazy. I have been working as an education consultant cum trainer in Slave-park since May 18 (One week after my UK grad trip with Jono) and I'm beginning to feel jaded .. most of the time. It's always the same. Write propsals, submit onto Gebiz, fix sales appointments, secure deal with teach, issue confirm workshop forms, develop content, train coaches, execute program, wrap up with service report. I'm proud to report that I have coached in over 30 local schools within the span of 8 months. I am still amazed at what God has done in me and through me. Never have I thought I would excel as head coach (i.e. Project manager) for a few cohort projects.. let alone think I'll be appointed as one. God is good cuz the teachs are happy.
Take this week for example. Coached at 4 schools this week... with excellent performance especially for a Sec sch in the East (The Sec 5 NA class enjoyed the grooming and oral comm. program I delivered) and a sec sch in Serangoon (Sec 1 NT class is bratty but I still pulled it off well and unscathed... I am also tremendeously relieved that my other coaches did well for their classes too cuz my neck is on the line here.) Having to wake up at the ungodly 5.30am was worth it.
God is really faithful even though I loathe my job (Surprising eh... you can loathe something that you excel in) I am trusting Him to help me transit into my overseas AIESEC internship. Yup... this is my secret life vest and stepping stone to another industry. During my final semester, I went for the AIESEC open house and sat through their gruelling interviews (way before I was asked to convert full-time). This is the very first thing that I trusted God for; that I will pass the interview and be one of the 5% out of 300 students to become an exchange applicant. And wow... God answers prayers! The dektos year of free favors indeed.
Sooo.. it's kinda stupid that I didn't jump on the exchange bandwagon immediately. Instead, I took this detour into Slave-park (having been overly-besotted with the ambitious promises made by my ex-manager WWP - bugger left in October) Oh yeah... it was thanks to the recession too that made me opt for the more convienent choice: stable job, good starting pay: 2.8 take home, 3.3 gross. versus tedious application process & low internship pay.
But having worked like a slave for the last year (with the exception of a fabulous holiday in Sydney with Kevin), I realized that it's time for me to move on.... the day is coming soon. I really can feel it. I knew from the start that I didn't want to stay in the education industry forever - had this worry of being stuck in this trench since I was in year 2. I think part of the reason to my acceptance of the fulltime job was because I thought I could gain invaluable experience to add to my resume before I apply abroad.
Well... grins* it did pay off... I think my resume looks stunning, even without a testimonial from the boss. I was awarded $450 in Sept 09 and $500 just this Friday 30 Jan 10 as performance bonuses... WOW... really undeserving. God deserves all the glory for giving me money (replenishing my depleted funds everytime after I travel back from another country). I did gain invaluable experiences too... in coaching, training, logistics, people and project management, interviewing and handling subodinates older than me. God did put me here for a reason.. to grow and get rid of my baka bad temper.
I have grown... I have matured... I know it's ready for me to take my life to the next stage. Slave park just opened opened a new branch (applause*). At least I'm in a company that looks good on the outside, that pays me on time, that taught me tolerance and tact through their incomprehensible and balloony decisions; to work with people whom I despise (Botak and hummingbird). By March I aim to accumulate at least $5k in my bank account. It's possible by injecting a slight bit of frugality. At least it's with a purpose - for me to have more than enough when I go...
I am bidding my time... The end is near. My new beginning awaits me real soon. I have started applying with the grace of God, that will lead me on to the next stage of my destiny. So.. apply!
12:18 AM
Monday, February 02, 2009
Okay...today I'm not my cool self because I feel like I'm on a verge of a mental breakdown. So I'm blogging because it will make me feel better. I'll be honest with you...my biggest fear is loneliness. To be honest, this semester has been really hard to live. This is the first time I've been totally by myself. The number of classroom hours sum up to four. I haven't seen the friends I hung out with, since none of them are in my class. I don't feel like an English major at all, not belonging to anywhere.
The rest of my time is spent working, tuitioning or doing my Final year paper. It's only the start of February and I feel like breaking down. As I begin to get used to the working world, I realize it is harsh. It is a lonely place. I have never felt so goddamm lonely before. Working by myself in my corner, facing the computer screen all day... tuitioning some bratty kids who waste their parents' money by fooling around... This pisses me off.
Its so unlike school. There is no one to guide you. NONE! You just have to prove your worth. (God help me man, cuz I really have nothing to prove). There's no support, nor encouragement. No person I can confide to. NONE.
Really really breaking down.... Crying does feel good for once. They are willing to convert me to a full-time coach asap. The pay is good (of course, it comes with the expected amount of work) But Why?! Why am I not happy? It is recession, people say.... 'you should stick to a job when you find one.' I so hate that. I want something better. And yet, I don't know what I want! it's tiresome searching for jobs, again and again.... I've repeated myself so many times: I don't want to be a MOE teacher. I don't want to go into teaching. But what else is there for me? What do I want to do? I've asked God so many times, but I still don't know. Am I being impatient? Probably. Yeah.... Persecutions arise for the word's sake but seriously, being patient seems so trying.... I am at my wit's end.
In a few months' time I am no longer a student. I will be a full fledged adult. (Turning 21 doesn't count) The thought of it scares me, do you know that? Sometimes I don't want to grow up. Sometimes, like now... I wish my life can just end here. A nice Fullstop. And then I can proceed straightaway to heaven. I guess these thoughts make me really paranoid. Is it natural to be this afraid of the future? My life has kind of changed drastically and I'm being thrown off my tracks.
It's like my head has been held underwater for the longest time and I am about to run out of oxygen to live. God I need air. I need refreshment. Right now before I decide not to breath any longer. I feel like giving up. Lord, I really can't take shit anymore. Help me ... please..... You who is faithful... please ... bring me out of my insanity.
3:49 PM
Thursday, January 29, 2009
1. I'm a morning person. Sometimes I wake up at 5.30 am to go for a swim or run. Feel free to join me.
2.I HATE Papayas - Bad experience when I was 5. Other than that, I'm open to any kind of fruit.
3. Alcohol doesn't really factor into my life. But I enjoy drinking Choya.
4. I lurve sushi, sashimi, curry katsudon, ramen and pratically all kinds of Japanese food.
5. I lurve lurve watching Japanese/ Korean dramas and anime online.
6. I lurve lurve lurve listening to Japanese pop/rock/ anime music. I'm rather selective about other kinds of music in general.
7. Can you believe that my main text for my final year Lit thesis is the anime, Ghost in the Shell?
8. I'm currently obsessed with coloured contact lenses with different patterns from Korea.
9. Don't buy me flowers on any occasion, especially on dates. It's a total waste of money. I hate to lug dead weeds home and watch them wither and rot on my table.
10. Buy me dark chocolates instead. =) My fav!
11. I have no qualms spending $$ dining out on good food and company.
12. Don't EVER make me watch horror movies! I get traumatized very easily and I will kill you in return as part of my trauma.
13. My dream car is a huge 8 seater MPV or a Jeep.
14. I have been trained to save drowning victims in the water.
15. Toastmasters is my favourite CCA cuz I like giving speeches.
16. At times, I get distracted easily from work by more interesting things around me.
17. I am quite greedy: Have found two jobs in this recession but am still looking for a better one.
18. I stopped watching TV since I was 13 years old
19. I stopped drrinking carbonated drinks like coke and sprite since I was 13 years old too.
20. I don't like eating steamboat outside as I question the freshness and the quality of the ingredients.
21. I arrange my wardrobe according to color (from the lightest to the darkest shade.)
22. I would love to own 5 dogs; a West Highland terrier, the Daschund, the corgee, the beagle and the Pomenarian, in my future house. Hope they can all get along well together.
23. After 4 years of procrastinating, I still haven't signed up for driving lessons. Obviously I'm meant to be chauffered.
24. I like being captured in photos only when I'm in the mood.
25. My 2009 ang-pow collection was damm good ...
10:32 AM
Sunday, January 11, 2009
It's a brand New Year. Hmm.. can't believe that 2008 has just whizzed by and now we're in 2009, the year of free favors from God for me. Heehee... This semester is by far the most free as I have only 2 very fun electives to take (excluding FYP of course.) I have started on my thesis and my main texts are from the Ghost in the Shell series. And since I'm doing science fiction, it's no surprise that Wagner is my advisor.... hmm... high expectations ya?
Please don't assume that I'm very free because half my week goes to coaching and tuitioning. I'm beginning to recognise the importance of time management, but I still feel damm slack at times like NOW... Ah.. just came back from dinner at ABC market with my family. Will blog more soon (hopefully). Once I've reinstalled photoshop on my laptop, I'll upload some December holiday pictures too!
(*PS... ooh... last thing: Thanks to Yujun, I've bought and worn my first pair of colored contacts. I look so chio! Lol.)
9:25 PM
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Ahh.. another breather. I'm currently in the midst of my exam period and I have thus completed 3 heavy papers so far (Public admin, adv modernism and the study of modern Eng). It seems like the majority of the exam load has fallen off my shoulders after 7.30pm yesterday because I am so done with the toughest papers this semester. To be honest, I was kind-of struggling through public admin =( *apparently studied for the wrong topic. I think I handled Advance modernism well. But it was a pleasant surprise that I found the linguistic paper do-able! Unlike the first test and all the tutorial sessions, I actually did the frigging paper... completed it with hardly any blanks! Sob* Praise the Lord...
This paper was the most worrisome of all my modules. Simply because I nearly flunked the first quiz and I came in empty-handed for most of the tutorial sessions, just to copy the answers to the analysis which should be done as homework. This cause me to realize that I haven't changed must since secondary school. I STILL don't do HOMEWORK! (Weekly tutorials etc)
Can you believe it? It's amazing that I survived for 4 years in NTU without doing weekly HOMEWORK! Well, I guess the only reason to my healthy grades is that most of the Eng Lit does not have tutorials of THAT sort. It's just one big-ass essay or essays worth 50% of the total grade.... and THAT... I can handle.
Wow... prior to this, I had no idea that doing tutorials were that important. *Pardon me for my blurness and ignorance.... cuz I'm living in a bubble. If I had taken the tutorials more seriously throughout the semester, I'm sure grades won't be an issue. -_- But I had enough sense to practice the tutorials over and over again right up to yesterday's evening paper.... and well... let's just trust God that it is well ya?
I still have two more papers next week. But I'm feeling more relaxed because I have more than a week to prepare for them. As usual, I highly suspect that my paper falls on the last day of the exam, just like former semesters. Why oh why? Why can't they shift our exams to an earlier date? I heard the comms students finish very early! I want to finish early too so I can have a longer December holiday (Tutioning, coaching and getting more money to spend for X'mas shopping ~ to heck with the recession).
Anyway... the good news that happened over these two months is that I have been offered to 2 jobs... working for 2 different companies dealing with the education sector in Singapore. I've signed on to the first company as a public speaking coach (I think some of you knew that). The second job is in the finalizing stages. What's happening is that the boss of my tution agency has asked me whether I wanted to covert to a full time staff upon graduation as he is revamping his company into a learning centre... which is cooler because tutioning aside, a learning centre is able to extend to areas like coaching etc etc... (which spells~ bottomline... big money in times of recesssion.)
On one hand, I am very excited because Singapore is a place where education is a big business. Sure, being a 'cher' in MOE is comfortable and respectable ... but I believe I'm not meant for that. MOE is a place for teachers with a real calling and love to teach students. I love to teach as well, but I can really do without all the dogmatic rules and regulations (Like no outrageously dyed hair~ no way man! I'm into dye and highlights! And I'll encourage my students who are old enuff to dye their hair as well, if they look better in it / And 'dress appropriatel'y... urgh... hello, I was one of those girls who get sentenced to detention for wearing ankle socks in JC.)
Reading articles about those teachers that suffer because they have to hide their private lives and live as a good example makes me sick to the core. So that's why a learning centre is a very good place for me to be a mentor who's a friend, and not a 'cher' who has to discipline. I think I'm a private sector-person... regardless of which sector I in.
Still, I'm not putting all my eggs into one basket. I'm still going to try out for that AIESEC work internship thingy as well as submit my resume to some companies that I've previously worked for or worked with. I'm also determined to get my driving license by next year and pursue my diploma in music (This is one unfinished skill that I'm good at.. and it will be a waste if I don't continue.) All I can say is that, at this point, I don't know what the future holds for me... but I know that God has made it good.
All right... enuff yabbering... here are some pictures from my family celebrating belated birthdays at Keyaki in Pan Pacific hotel...
Behold the ala carte Japanese buffet.... (Kushimbo pales in comparison because everything here is premium grade. Unforth... we footed the premium price too... say about $300 ++...
The food, especially the sashimi and baby lobster..... is simply FRESH FRESH FRESH and habit-forming... One bite into anything... say the manguro tuna belly and it melts in your mouth like butter! No kidding... it was a pampering session for my tongue and palette. I can never eat at low grade conveyor belt sushi restaurants ever again.
The food conoissers. (From left, Dad and Steph)
(Me and Mom)
Nom nom nom.... (me chewing on a softshell crab handroll)
One of the best meals of our lives.... you can tell my parents are happy.
Hehe... am trying a new photoshop brush with the words 'Nippon'. It did suit the context of the picture.
Well... I hope to visit this lovely restaurant again, when I graduate with a good job and a 'ahem' very cushy salary. =D
9:37 AM
Monday, October 27, 2008
Hi. I'm going to do my last essay of this semester once I'm done with this post. With the PSLE and the primary school exams already over, I am slightly freer to blog these days. Here are the pics from NTU InspYre Halloween chapter meeting held last Tuesday. It was organized by You Jun and myself. I must admit that all the organizing and planning did cost us abit of our precious time, but it was all worth it as everyone had a blast. The turnout was good and the tabletopics extremely fun (Though some thought it was too challenging~ pfff!)
I came dressed as Hinata from the Naruto anime this year. You might be wondering why I chose to ahem.. cosplay her. Well, on the practical side, her jacket is the only wearable jacket of the lot of costumes and it does look nice (jacket's kind of cute!). I thought that if I were to buy something over $100, I need to be able to wear it again. Plus, the guy at the cosplay shop said likewise, so that's why I came as Hinata despite being so different from her personality.
And here are the people and the pics!
Faith~ the Uber Nerd (I take my hats off to her).
Eric ~ The Jiang Shi ~ mising his vamp teeth. (guy in chinese robe with KISS-like make up)
Me~ Hinata (Ain't I cute? teeheehee)
Helaine~ Princess Fiona with her Shrek plushie
Stephanie~ Gypsy (She won the best dress prize/ credits to my accessories)
Jasmine~ poison ivy (She won the most economical dress prize)
You Jun~ pirate from a bloody brawl with a knife in his head
Zhang Lei~ Akido master (don't play play)
San ~ Witch (Her speech was about poisoned food).
Fei Fei~ Princess with tiara (Tiara costs $3.oo)
Dennis~ Passing off as James Bond cuz he had presentation earlier. lol~
Angeline~ Artist (She really does look like one)
Helaine was soo cute as Princess Fiona. I kept disturbing her husband Shrek by poking him with the Kunai. Helaine is sooo dramatic.
(*Credits go to the brushes I downloaded form deviantart).
Maybe next we should come up with 'the most dramatic prize' next year so people like her can win something. I finally saw how she wore the wig on her head. The wig felt scratchy when I tried it on. (Gah... don't know how she can take it). Btw, the guys used my kunai to pop every single balloon after the meeting. It is after all a sharp object ^^.
Thanks guys, girls and members alike for dressing up and attending for this special event. NTU InspYre rules!
1:37 PM
Monday, September 22, 2008
Hihi! Sorry for not blogging in such a long time. I have tons of pics to upload. But unfortunately, my camera battery just refused to be charged. =( And my fujitsu tablet just had to crash again. I got to get it fixed. Hopefully, they won't reformat my computer because all my pictures are inside....
Anyway, life has been quite hectic this semester. I just had my mid-term tests and I was quite unprepared for almost everything. (Urgh, don't even want to think about it.)
19th September just passed and I realized that I'm 23 years old! Omg.... I remember when I was 18, I was contemplating, 'exactly how would I look when I reached 23?' Well, I'm 23 now and I don't feel any different, except that life's wayy better than it was during my JC days. Compared to last year, this year's birthday celebrations are comparatively fewer. Celebrated my birthday only with 3 groups: lifesaving, NTU animal group and my church groupie (Pics will be uploaded at a later date when I'm not so busy). I'm actually fine with that because I'm quite burnt out.
I didn't celebrate my b day with my family either, though dad gave me $200 for my b-day present. (heehee....)I think the greatest present I gave myself was when I finally settled the remaining debt from that Bitch's phonebill. A whopping $484 in total! God is so good to place 5 weeks in the month of August~ heehee.. pay increase.
So officially, I'm DEBT FREE! YAY! But I still want my money back from that woman. Sigh.... She is a coward to avoid answering my phone calls. I don't even want to kill her. I just want my money back. She can even pay me in installments. Mrs. Jennifer Lee, let me be precise, you owe me $3000 plus in total. If you're reading this, please do not shy away in guilt. When confronted with the lawyer's letter from the phone companies, I faced up to the problem and here I am... 6 months later... DEBT FREE.
Just wanna say that please.... stop being and coward and trust God to help you settle whatever you owe me and your other debtors ok?
I'm not angry, but this experience has indeed changed my perspective on things. It has made me a wiser person. I remembered what my pastor said at the start of this year: God is causing all things to be shaken, so that the things that cannot be shaken, may remain.
In a way, I'm glad that this problem was revealed in February... I guess that was the divine shaking. And through that, God has given me favour to so many different jobs: as a lifeguard, teaching assistant, events coordinator, emcee and finally tutor. Within 6 months, my bank account experienced a 100% increase. It is indeed God's grace.... and I'm soo thankful. I guess this is the best birthday present I can ever give myself.
One other good news is that I won the humorous speech contest (Club level) again, this year. And I got 2nd-runner up for the Area contest~ which was good because I was seriously burnt out from school work and doing speeches. Unlike last year, I did a new speech for the area contest because humorous speech 1 had too many inside jokes. Bad news was that I broke down before the contest... hence the 3rd prize. I really could have done better if I had a smooth taxi ride to the venue.
(Latest Update*) After 10 years of the same hairstyle, I decided to go for a haircut. Yep.... and this is how I look right now... (taken on my laptop's webcam)
So far, most people do like it. But it is amazing that the people who are adversed to it are my love ones, like Yujun my cousin and Stephanie, my sister. (*Kevin hates it too... because he thinks I look like a nerd~ Whateva!) They reason for not liking it as much was that this hairstyle did not suit my sporty personality. It might be true... but I'll figure a way to look sporty instead of preppy.
Gotta get back to my essay on Virginia Woolf's 'Between the Acts'. I've got till Friday to finish it. LORD HELP ME......
10:09 AM
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Okay.... it's been a month since I blogged and things just keep on accumulating in my life. So I guess the Hongkong pictures cannot be delayed any longer. Here's Part 1 of my Hongkong trip:
Our departure time for Hongkong was at 5am, an ungodly hour when most Singaporeans are still in slumber land. Travelling to HK on a budget airline was not airy-fairy either. I had a sore back after the plane touched down. Nevertheless, I'm glad the eight of us made it!
Upon arrival, the next rational thing would be to 'check in' our luggage into our hostel, Swire Hall, at Hongkong University. Thanks to Irene from HKU for providing such a comfortable and cheap place for us to stay. Frankly I was expecting rather dismal living conditions (as compared to the comforts of my home). But Swire Hall exceeded my expectations by a mile! Behold, my spacious air-conditioned room!
Ahh.... ultra-comfort throughout our stay. After unloading our stuff in our rooms, we then proceeded to Central for our first SHOPPING Spree. Central was really crowded that day because Hongkongers were celebrating the Chinese dumpling festival.
I did really spend much on day one (Only on one Muji top and a T-shirt) because I knew we had seven more days to go, but the other girls, especially Dixi had already splurged on apparel from Uni qlo and Zara in Times Square. How not to resist the latest trends right? Besides the fashion scene in Hongkong is wayy more updated than what we have at home.
Of course I went on a shopping rampage from day 2 onwards in bargain places like Mongkok (They have H & M there!) and the upmarket district of Tsim tsa tsui. Here are some group pics of these places (except the last two which were taken in the later days of our HK trip).
In addition, our kind host Irene arranged a tour of the HK uni premises with our guide, Toby, a graduate student of some engineering field. Through this tour, I learnt that the history of HKU was fraught with more urgent political controversies like NTU... they even had a pillar of shame erected in front of the student union center to remember the atrocity which happened at Tiananmen square. (I'm not showing it) But there were other pleasant facts about HKU too: Sun Yat Sen was a student there! Nice.
Besides touring HKU, we didn't forget the original purpose of our visit: To attend toastmasters meetings: Here are two of the venues that we went to. #1 HSBC Building for HSBC toastmasters club. Haha... I felt exclusive because you need a security pass to get in the building. heehee!
#2: Lingnan Toastmasters University. The university grounds seem more like a castle of some previous century. It would have felt kind of surreal if there weren't modern housing flats opposite the university. Walking through the university can make one feel so 'zen'. Then again, maybe because I was enjoying the quiet and calm of the evening. As Lingnan was situated in the new territories, pictures reflect the HK countryside. You can see Shenzhen, mainland China from there.
Part 2 will continue soon!
9:21 PM
Tuesday, July 08, 2008
This is my 3rd time working with V-campus but instead of the usual teaching assistant job with Stanford EPGY (last week was with United College and Singapore American School, conducted at Chinese High), I'm now helping V-campus as an assistant event coordinator for Oracle Instructors Institute course. At first, my boss proposed to pay me only $300 for 5 days, but after learning that one of my tasks is to stand in as emcee for their opening dinner and dance, I did a little bit of bargaining with him and finally got him to up my pay to $350. Yeah... I know it's not much to some of you, but it's better than nothing. I was paid $50 for my emceeing stint at a convocation dinner too.
But wth..... those people-in-charge really milked every bit of the extra $50. For the first time in my life, I realized why people prefer student life to work life because the working world is RUTHLESSSSS!
Initially, I was perfectly fine with being the host of the dinner and dance. My thoughts were, 'Emceeing is a piece of cake. I'm a toastmaster yadda yadda...'
Yeah, you know what Esther.... it's all bullshit.
This is not la-la-toastmaster land. This is real work. And for real work, clients don't give a shit. For those of you who have seen me preparing for speeches, you will know that my rehearsals display the worse of public speaking. Mistakes, hiccups, wrong pronounciations etc etc etc.....
So my worse nightmares came true at yesterday's rehearsal when 2 of the people-in-charge suddenly barge into the room to evaluate my presentation and to 'offer feedback'. F.E.E.D.B.A.C.K. that made me feel smaller than an ant, scathing comments that made me doubt my public speaking abilities, and helpful suggestions that cause me to keep apologising profusely even though it wasn't my fault. To be honest, I nearly broke down in front of those people due to the bitchy atmostphere.
But...... I'm glad after being bombarded for the entire afternoon... I'm happy to say that everything went well during the dinner and dance. Yay..... I succeeded as a host (Prayed fervently in the toilet before everything started... and God came through for me... hallelujah.) It was major for me because all the V.I.Ps and executives from Oracle Corp were seated there. And I'm soooooo happy that they enjoyed themselves. (Sob* sigh.....). As some of the performances were arranged by the Singapore Tourism board, some of the STB executives came as well. And one of them gave me his name card! He told me that I emceed well and that I could always come to him if I ever needed a job or an internship. (YAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!!!!) All things did abound for my good! Now the worst is over and I can add yesterday's achievements to my resume.
As for the other $300, it comes from my duties; making sure that the buffet meals arrive on time, ensuring that guests are satisfied during their break, a minimal amount of printing sooo far, and the rest comes from me slacking in front of the computer when they are in meetings. =)
(P.S.* I even get to da pao the good food. =P) TATA!
2:25 PM
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Hi, it's been awhile since I blogged, (Hmm.. I always seem to say that...) but never mind. I was in Hong Kong for an 8 day toastmasters trip with my fellow club members, and the entire trip was enjoyable. The photos will be coming up shortly.
Right now it's getting late, so I will just barf out a highlight this past week. Many things have happened at the Civil Service Club where I work as a lifeguard. Initially everything was fine when I made friends with the personal trainers at the club gym. Some, like this girl, Baby-G, gelled with my temperament instantly. We had fun working out, trying to lose our fat in the gym together (Yes, personal trainers are not all body perfect).
Overall, the personal trainers and the lifeguards work in harmony. But things started to go down for me when one of the guy personal trainers tried to get 'close-r' to moi. Gosh, even as I am typing, I still find the entire encounter incredulous.
Very simple: He send me a 'wish-you-well cum watch-your-diet-in-HK' friendly sms before I departed for Hong Kong. Because I did not subscribe to roaming services, my phone was switched off till I landed back in Singapore.... tired, but full with happy memories....
And out of the blue, he send me an sms: Hi Sayang, how's the weather there? (So far so good) Do take care of yourself ok? (Orh.) Actually, I am missing you alot. (HUH?) Sorry for bothering you (What absolute Shite!)
WTF.... seriously! That was soo bloody random! I felt so insulted. How could someone from the club; THE CLUB THAT I WORK AT..... (Breathes*) dare to get fresh with me? Huh HUh HUH????? Who does that block of wood think I am? Do I look that EASY?
I was so pissed... so I sent him a rather curt reply: Yo dude. Thanks for your concern, but I don't need it. Also, you have no right to address me as Sayang. I have never been your sayang, am not your sayang and certainly will never be your sayang ever. (How could you ever think it was possible?!) I do have a name in case you didn't notice. I still believe you are a nice dude. Wish you all the best, but you are definitely barking up the wrong tree. Are we clear on this? =) (To think I even bothered to add a smiley).
Grosssssss...... let me roughly describe the kind of person he is: Well, on the plus side, he does have a hot muscular bod. He won 3rd place for fitness competition..... But I'm simply not interested. To be really honest, I'm a 'face person' that's why. And his face spells 'poserish-bad boy rapper wannabe'. Some other stupid girl might like this kind of 'dangerous playaar' but not me. His face spells trouble.
In addition, he smokes. Bleh.... I don't care how fit you are/ how you maintain your hot bod/ how you watch your diet. Once a guy smokes, he's off the list..... One other main reason why I don't look his way is because he is Muslim. Sure I do have Muslim friends. Nothing personal or religious, but I don't date Muslims. They won't date me either for obvious reasons.... both sides are mutual. (If you don't get it, then you're really dumb).
Last thing that might piss some of you off.... He didn't complete his education. On this aspect, it's just me. I prefer guys who are educated period. Well, I won't exactly strike someone with no education off the list, but that someone has better be damm successful in his career. And trust me, that personal trainer is not even a millionaire... so he can forget about it.
Notice that I didn't bother mentioning that I have a boyfriend? Not that it is not important. I bring out the subject of 'boyfriend' only when I deem the other fella worthy of competition. This guy? LOL.... need I say more?
I know I sound very bitchy and arrogant right now but I deserve to vent this 'shite' out on my blog. It's my only breathing space. If you don't like it, feel free to press the 'x' on the top right hand anytime. Anyway... I made a complaint to my senior colleague, my supervisor as well as his gym manager... and from what I observe so far, everyone is having a good laugh at him. Right now, I got the feeling that he's too embarrassed to face me. But whatever; this is life. We are human after all.
But......
In my case, I think DaddyGod has ridiculously bestowed undeserving favor on me because that bloke still customized a training/fat-loss program for me. That fella is known to be a sadist trainer who produces good results among all his female clients. No joke... I tried it out with the girl trainer, Baby-G and boy... it was tough.... and effective. I lost 2% of fat and 1 kg right the very first time! It was unbelievable. For those of you who are interested in losing weight like I am, you can follow his program (If you dare):
Cross-trainer workout (Cardio): 20mins, level 6, heartrate RPM above 70.
Warm up stretch
Crunches 4 sets x 20
Crunches (Elbow to knee) 2 sets x 20
Inclined Chest press: 3 sets x 15 (Weights 5kg)
Compound raise: 3 sets x 10 (Weights 3kg)
Lat pulldown (triceps): 3 sets x 15 (Weights 6.5kg)
Tricep pressdown: 3 sets x 15 (Weights 12kg)
Bicep curl: 3 sets x 15 (Weights 3kg)
Leg press: 4 sets x 15 (Weights 55kg)
Leg curl: 4 sets x 15 (Weights 26kg)
Leg extension: 4 sets x 15 (Weights 26kg)
Side leg raise: 3 sets x 25
Floor trunk twist: 3 sets x 12
Plank position (Followed by 'cat-curl' stretch) 3 sets x 30 seconds.
Cool down stretch.
That bloke's advice: do it 5 times a week. Rest well on weekends. Abstain from all carbohydrates for two months and you will not only shed all the extra pounds, but maintain your shapely figure. It is also hard to gain back the weight you would have lost too....
Tempting... but I'll probably start on the workout officially after I join a proper gym. Feel free to join me.
12:43 AM
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Hi all, I have yet again been bombarded with a busy work schedule ever since the start of May. The updates in my life have snowballed till I realized that I have a lot to blab about. For those of you who don't know, I signed on a short internship with this company called V-Campus as a teaching assistant to Stanford University EPGY (Don't ask me what it stands for) creative writing program for SCGS girls (Sec 1-3). It's quite a mouthful, I know. But there's no other way to explain it.
And soo.... Rathi and I were the T.A.s to the brilliant Lee Konstantinou from Stanford University. I'm actually relieved that I got on well with everybody throughout the course because the lecturers that I worked with a few years back in N.I.E. were quite dogmatic. But it was easy to work with Lee who was easy going. (No probs with Rathi of course, as we're in the same course). Hmm.. about the students themselves...
Initially, I had mixed feelings about being a T.A. in an independent school because I was told that some of the girls are exceptionally gifted. And I'm not joking. The 10 day course was very intense throughout, as the girls have to complete 300-500 word drafts almost everyday. And by the end of the course, they had to write a 2000 word short story. Even the university workload isn't that intense! I was stunned when some of them told me they were used to it. (.....) No wonder they ace their studies. (Brains + practice + practice......) will sure get you somewhere.
Overall, I enjoyed my time as a T.A. I'm so happy to see the girls actively participating in class discussions. This is so rare as most schools only don't practice this culture. Mostly, it is the teacher who happens to be the only ones talking in a dead class. (How do I know? I'm one of the zombies too.) And even though we didn't win the best skit at the end of the course, I'm still so proud of their enthusiasm and talents. Haha.... I think I'm gushing like an idiot. Lol.
One of the girls uploaded the skit on youtube. If you're interested, click here to watch. It's basically about a couple who quarrels, separates, and tries to reconcile with each other, while watching a movie in a cinema. If you are wondering if this looks familiar, the idea actually came from a skit done during my 1st 3 months orientation. (Credits to the genius who came up with it, though I don't know your name).
And here's a blurry pic of my entire class. (Sorry. This is all I received so far).
Will blog more tomorrow... Promise.
9:36 AM
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Exams are finally overr!!!! ROAR! I'm so happy I can scream non stop, except the fact that people will think I'm crazy. Blogging has not been part of my life lately because of the influx of essays (Apparently I had more essays to do this sem) and the grueling revision for exams. Post modernism was my last paper. In my opinion, it was the toughest out of all the subjects. I didn't do that well at all for my post mod essay (Got a B). I was squirming in front of Murphy when I went to collect my essay as his remarks about my essay were rather appalling. =( In general, there was much to be said about the syntax and grammar that affected my ideas in the essay. But after confessing to him that I was not enjoying every moment of in the writing process, I was embarrassed because he told me that my attitude was reflected in my writing.... gah....
Whatever... there were others like me who 'suffered' too. I am so not a post mod. person. Realism RAWKS my socks baby.... Did well in all the other realist modules (essay wise; especially in American literature). Never gotten so many As in my life at one go.... I am contented. (Bliss*)
Yesterday was quite a bit of a shock as something happened to my dad's leg. Some of you may know that he has a clot on his leg for several years now, but blood unexpectedly burst from his leg yesterday. We were all freaked out because the floor looked like a murder scene. My dad happened to step on his blood and his footprints left a bloody trail on the floor (Like the escape of the murder or something). My mum and my sis quickly dashed him to the hospital, leaving me to clean up the bloody mess. FREAKY.... I have never cleaned a pool of blood before. The thought that it was my dad's blood scared me into the realization of the importance in the matters of life and death and I never prayed so hard, while cleaning the floor with shaky hands. But thank God, my dad's bleeding was not life threatening. He came home by midnight with a bandage wrapped around his leg. He took leave today and is back to normal (Thanks for all your prayers).
Now... that exams are over, I've decided to look around for an internship program to gain experience during the holidays. I didn't sign up with the school's internship program because (1) I couldn't be bothered and (2) I guess I can use the 3AUs for some other interesting subjects. I'm in the midst of typing out my resume so I can start submitting to wherever I want asap.
If you're bothered to know about that financial crisis I endured awhile earlier, well, I'm still making my payments on time without starving my ass off. It's amazing that tithing with a revelation of Christ is really powerful, although it is expected that only some of you will know what I'm talking about.
What else? Oh.... my table is in a mess. Always is after exams. It's called the ravages of post exams. The shelf above me is overloaded with files since year one and I'm very amazed that it hasn't sagged under all the weight of the thick files accumulated over the years. I counted the files in total. I have 5 thick files of A level history and 5 thick files of A level lit (They do come in handy sometimes) and (Shudder*) I have more than 30 THICK files of literature since year 1.... It is certainly worth more than a group of trees combined. Gawd... how am I going to clear them all????
Whatever... I have enough time to clear everything. Now I would really want to slack. But not before introducing my latest major crush to you guys.... My boyband crush (gah! Feel like an adolescent again) is this Korean confection called Super Junior which is a 13 member group resembling somewhat like Johnny Jr. and Morning Misume. I wanna blame Yujun for introducing me to this fabulous group because I'm hooked onto their variety and drama/ comedy shows on youtube and crunchyroll. Hee... never had so many superficial crushes at one go. =D Anyway here is my current favourite picture of them.
Top row from left to right: Hee Chul, Sung Min, Dong Hae, Siwon, Hankyung and Eunh yuk.
Bottom row (Ditto): Kang In, Ye Seung, Ryeo wook, Shin Dong, Kyu hun, Kibum and Leeteuk. Feel free to guess my favorite members..... heehee...
SLACKING TIME IS NOW>....... tata!
9:32 PM
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
It is a good ending to the Toastmasters International Speech Contest (Area Level). Two days ago, Chrystella and I represented our club, NTU InspYre at the area contest. I contested for the International speech while Chrystella contested for the table topics.
Good news..... we both won. (Well, for me, I was the 1st runner up for International speech, but Chrystella was the champion for table topics. =D So she will be representing our club at the division level on the 26th of April.
Initially I was slightly peeved that I didn't win. However, considering that it was my first international speech contest, and that the auntie that I lost out to was a heavy weight, annnddd, that my speech was a very last minute effort, I think I did brilliant! HAHA.... Well, to stay on the positive side, this speech was a brand new speech from the one I did about my debt.
I was supposed to do that speech for the contest. But I felt that I've gotten over the misery and the angst and I didn't feel like bringing myself to rehearse a tragic 'high' and rehash what that B**ch has done to me. Because I felt more cheery these few weeks after I handed up 2 essays and gotten an A- for Ethnic American response (Sorry for ummm bragging... but I feel happy).
Annnddd, the speech I did on Monday can be counted as my project 9! In other words, this was my ninth speech. I have one more to go before I become a competent communicator. (It's all about ranking lah... you understand?)
Everyone thought that this was my best speech ever. And after awhile, I'm happy with the outcome in getting second place because I don't need to compete during exam period! HAHA..... I think I rather come in second place with this speech than get first with the previous speech. Really, this speech is wayyyy better.... A better way to deal with fear. (*Bear in mind that all of my speech comes from inspiration. None of it is true except the dolphin part, which inspired me after watching a myth busters video clip)
Soooo, presenting to you my winning project 9 speech : A mere four letters.
Splash! A colorful beach ball landed with a ‘plop’ in the middle of the pool. The outdoor party was lively. Men with growling stomachs grilled sausages and chickens wings by the barbeque pit. Their wives gathered round for a healthy dose of ‘chit-chat’. Boisterous kids ran all over the place. Everyone was having fun! No one noticed the beach ball … except for one little girl. Determined to retrieve the ball, she stepped gingerly into the water. Seconds later, panic and pandemonium broke out as a desperate cry for ‘help!’ came from the little girl floundering in the water. Someone dived in, scooped her out and brought her to safety. The little girl was saved! But her confidence was shattered.
Contest Chair, honorable judges, Ladies and gentlemen. I was that little girl who nearly drowned over a plastic beach ball. At the age of 3, I experienced the overwhelming smite of FEAR for the very first time. F. E. A. R. Fear! A mere four letters! But it can render a strong man powerless! Fear is not a pleasant thing indeed. Most of us would prefer to abide within the bright areas of our lives that are always familiar. If we had a choice, we would avoid the dark alleys of weaknesses where fear lurks as it will wait for its chance to pounce upon our backs and devour us unaware!
Because of the intractable Fear that gripped my fragile heart, I shunned all possible contact with water. From the early days of my childhood, the paranoia in my life became so extreme to the extent that I dare not go near to the edge of a pond to feed ducks! Embarrassing moments like these cause me curl up miserably and cry! Dear toastmasters, did you recall those ugly times when you were paralyzed by fear? Often, the daunting waves of cowardice would sweep through our minds and intimidate us to adopt an attitude of defeat. Willingly, we raise our hands in surrender, declaring ourselves as the tragic losers of our lives, causing us to be bitter, envious and resentful. Why? Why can’t we just run away from our problems?
Running away is easy. Just root ourselves to our own comfortable spot. But we limit the vast possibilities of life, whenever we fence ourselves in. Honestly, I wanted to avoid water forever. But my perspective was altered when my father sat me down on the sofa to watch a documentary. For once in my life, the beauty of the water unraveled itself to me in the form of this wondrous creature called the Dolphin. I was mesmerized when they leap and frolic among the crashing waves. I watch in amazement as their streamline bodies’ dive into the depths of the deep blue sea. Even the aggressive Great white sharks shrank away from them. Wow! How unbelievably awesome!
Watching them swim made me realize something: Dolphins are not afraid! Despite so many dangers, they continue riding the choppy waves with glee, fearlessly chasing away menacing sharks! In essence, they are masters of the sea. A sense of motivation stirred within my heart: I want to be just like them! I want to dance in the water! Surely, I will overcome my fear! It helped that my father was there. Because he proceeded to ask, ‘are you ready to sign up for your first swimming lesson?’
I’m glad I said ‘yes’ to swimming that day as I have never looked back. ! Bit by bit, I regained my confidence in the water during my swimming lessons. To all who are here tonight, I urge you to be like the dolphin in conquering the sharks of fear! Dare to turn around and stare at fear without flinching. Let’s charge forward with victory and watch fear flee before our very eyes. As for me, 10 years have passed and here I am proud to announce that I recently completed a 5 kilometer swim in one hour and 51 seconds! A total of one hundred laps in the pool. My friends, we shouldn’t wonder, ‘how to stop fear’. The question we ought to ask ourselves is ‘how much do we want to succeed? Because in our hearts, we know we are created to overcome obstacles; to grow from strength to strength and to gain control over our own destiny. Once again, I present to you a mere 4 letters; F.E.A.R: Face it, eradicate and rule in your life. Contest Chair.
Yup. I really hope you like it. Because the speech brought me on a new level of 'high' when I said those words with conviction.
Also, NTU InspYre's last meeting was yesterday. And it was a blast! Everything went well. We bought two cakes, (One for b-day celebrations and the other was a pre-exam cake). The attendance was at its peak! The speeches were brilliant and quirky. The evaluation speeches were smoooth... the table topics were interesting (Good job Eric), and the games were the BEST!
Peals of laughter abounded throughout the whole room for 45 minutes. Everyone participated in the speech games conjured up by Putu. This speech game thingy is really a good idea. I'm so proud that we came up with it because it brought the members of our club, close together. It is unlike a normal chapter meeting where everything is hmm... formal and hmm... standardly fine. I really felt that we as NTU InspYre, have found our place as a club that knows how to have looads of fun, how to improve ourselves and encourage each other. In essence, I believe we have found our club identity that is distinctive, unique and spectacular to our own. I thank you all who have made yesterday's meeting a great success!
Right now, I gotta dash off for a job briefing. It's coaching again... but with a different company. One that hopefully pays ON TIME. Hee. =P
11:11 AM
Thursday, March 06, 2008
These two weeks have been filled with madness. I tell you, the recess week wasn't a break at all. It just meant no classes at school. But I was occupied with assignments all the same. In order to hand my post-mod essay up on time, I canceled my lifeguard shift on Sunday (Boo!) to gain extra time. I remembered I slept at 3am this Monday morning just to write my final point. And I seriously thought I would have a week to breathe before I start on my next essay.
FAT CHANCE..... Monday afternoon came and Dr. B.S. reminded us that we have to hand in our African lit essay the following Monday. My only reaction was WTF! Not again! The feeling was the same as when I did 300 butt lifts in a gym class only to rest for one second before being pushed by the trainer to do the next set.
Today's Thursday and let's just say that I've managed to get started on my essay. Although I do not have an exact thesis in words, I do have an idea of what I'm going to write about. Another good thing is that I felt the worse storm (Post-mod essay) is over! I really struggled with words even though I liked my chosen text (Italo Calvino's Invisible Cities), because the whole process was so slippery! There are no obvious points that you can hold onto, which simply frustrates me.
On the other hand, writing an essay for African Lit seems much easier as I'm more of a post-colonial-realist. What's more is that I have the secondary sources are powerful enough to sustain my thesis and that I'm familiar with the book (Yea! Chinua Achebe and heart of darkness). This will be the 3rd time I'm using Joseph Conrad's heart of darkness novel (That book never seems to go away.....) but it will be a supporting text to 'Things Fall Apart' instead. To make things more interesting, I'm also using Herge's Tintin in the Congo (A damm racist text) as a secondary source for intertextuality.
And if you didn't notice, I've reverted my blog to one of the older layouts made by my cousin, Yujun. I was a very diligent blogger when this layout was given to me. Guess I missed those days... where there are no distractions like facebook and multiply. Just good old blogspot.
Last thing before I go back to doing my essay: I've made a new banner just for fun. This time my poster-boys are from 12012 (The lead vocalist and one of his members, dunno their names) they happened to pose in the right way. Making the banner was somehow therapeutic to my brain too. Hope you think its nice.
TATA!
4:18 PM
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Sorry for not blogging in such a long time. Something really bad happened to me over the Chinese New Year period and it made me so upset... but I've now gotten over it more or less. And I have to say that at least one good thing came out of it; my project 8 speech (Use of visual aids) which was presented at yesterday's Toastmaster International Speech contest (Club level) won first prize! Yay.... It meant a lot to me this time round that I was the club champion because it literally contained my life (Mainly about what had happened).
The speech you're about to read is in a raw finished form but basically contained the gist of what had happened. (Glad that my parents are happy with my win. And thanks to all the peeps and contestants; especially Putu, Agam, Chrystella, Shreya, Zhang Lei, Faith and Yuen San who listened to my speech.) Here goes:
It was a bright and sunny morning. After giving a good YAWWNNn, I literally woke up with a big grin on my face: Contest Chair, honorable judges, ladies and gentlemen, that day was CHINESE NEW YEAR! (Flashes ang pow!) It was the time of the year where I get a substantial boost in my annual income from all the visiting! But little did I know that my happiest season of February was crushed (Crush and throw away Angpow) just moments after.
A warning letter arrived in the mailbox, specifically addressed to me: ‘Dear Miss Esther Yap, we regret to inform you that if you do not make the full payment of 2112 dollars and 69 cents within seven working days, we will have no choice but to take legal action against you for this hand phone account was registered under your name. What have I done? WHAT HAVE I DONE? (Drops the letter) It was then that I knew my WORST FEARS had finally caught up with me.
4 years ago, I registered a hand phone account for my ex-tutor under my name, simply because she needed a phone line. After all, ‘what’s in a name’ and besides, I knew her for many years now. She WILL DEFINITELY pay her bills on time right? …. It turned out that I was wrong. The character of man can indeed become unpredictable in desperate times. I know that because she chose to run away from her problems, leaving me behind as the guarantor to deal with her mess.
Did you remember how it was when your worst fears caught up with you? The circumstances leading to fear can be very cruel right? (Pause) That day, I just cried; over the betrayal of trust, over my own foolishness, over a HUGE DEBT that has wrongfully become mine! Ladies and gentlemen, in the troubles that beset all of our lives, (Loud urgent tone*) who can really help us?! Who can really accept the mistakes we make? Who can really pick up the broken shards of life, piece them back together and move on?!
For me, I can’t turn to my friends for financial assistance. There’s no point borrowing money from one source just to pay another! I could always depend on my parents to bail me out of trouble. But if I allowed that to happen, I am no better than that complacent and irresponsible person like my so-called friend. In such circumstances, fear can seem really daunting, looming over me, like a formidable enemy threatening to destroy my life. In times like these, I really want to be a coward and run away from it all! Only that I didn’t run when I was afraid. The truth is the only person who can deliver my life from the fears and troubles of my own making was… me.
Despite all the hurts, I swallowed my fears and called the phone company to negotiate a payment plan in installments. Guess what? It wasn’t as bad as I thought as the management was agreeable to my proposal. Initially I was fearful about not being able to make payments on time. But after realizing that fear can only paralyze me when I allowed it to enter my heart, I changed my mind about the whole situation and chose to see my problems, not as obstacles, but as opportunities presented in my life for me to mature and become a wiser person! In the midst of distress, I challenged myself to rejoice when I paid my debt as I know that each settled payment brings me one step closer to my financial freedom.
So far, I have already made my first payment, but unlike before, I have essentially stopped being fearful. Like the birds flying in the air, fear will always be encircling our lives, be it in school where one frets over exam results or at work where one worries about getting retrenched. We can’t stop troubles from flying above us but I’m sure we can stop trouble from building a nest of fear on our heads.
Often, many of us wish for a troubled-free life with no fear. But you know what? That’s not life! Because we will sometimes encounter incidents in our lives that may not go our way. Yet, I believe that we can choose whether to perceive our situation negatively and shrink away in fear, or to embrace our circumstances as a positive challenge that will enrich our lives. So dear friends, from now onwards, join me in taking on life’s exciting battles, because we know that victory is ours for certain when we dare to feast upon our troubles. So … Bring it on!
Yep... that's basically what happened to me. I've learned from my stupidity ... never to be a guarantor again, never to really depend and trust ANYONE regarding money matters. I'm glad that I learned this lesson early because others have lost bigger sums of money in the hundred-thousands and millions.
If any of you still wonder whether I'm in good shape, don't worry. I'm good. God has been good to me. (He gave me favor to win the contest! Yippee!) I count my blessings everyday now and I'm already on my way in getting out of this shit.
Btw.... to Mrs. Jennifer Lee (I'm not going to protect you anymore) .... whom I've really trusted and respected prior to this.... I would say that I'm VERY disappointed that you, who had been a strong influence in my adolescent life, chose to disappear completely without any explanation. Presuming that you have not been shot dead by your OTHER CREDITORS and your son hasn't gotten a heart attack from paying all your debts, I hope, against all hope that you will pay me back what you owe. Feel free to contact me to return all my money. (My number is still the same. I'm still the same.... I won't bite you even after you've done all this to me).
I'm not going to send the cops after you, neither am I going to curse you, nor persecute you. Since you still claim to be of the Catholic faith (Whatever...) I'm not afraid to say that God sees what you are doing and it is not a good testimony really. If you feel bad for me, don't be... FEEL BAD FOR YOURSELF because DaddyGod will make sure that I will never be shortchanged.
Enough said about this tragic- heart breaking saga of my life..... I'm out for now...
3:11 PM
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Shanghai trip photo-log....
Four words: I enjoyed myself throughly.
It was my second trip with Grand Sun co. and this 'business' trip turned out to be really a holiday for me and my cousin (Let's call him Qing short). We were so glad that both of us were going. In addition to that, we made new friends with the people who are under my mother's business line. People like Jacqueline and Abigail, who 'clicked' with us right after the first day! It's a divine connection because you guys were family to me on this trip. I'm soo looking forward to the next G.S. trip where we can travel together again! (Cheers*)
Anyway, here are the places we've visited:
Chen huan miao (Super touristy with almost nothing to buy.)
Nanjing lu (Somewhat like the former too.) We had a pleasant ride on the tram as it took us through the entire stretch of Nanjing lu. Qing high-5ved with those kids on the top-left picture as they passed by us. My parents also celebrated their 23rd wedding anniversary on that day too! Great marriage.
Xintiandi (Another touristy area with nothing to buy... unless you're filthy rich.) Beautiful X'mas and New Year decorations though. It was at this place where we all bonded really well over dinner at Ding Tai Fung (Yeah... so boring right? Why go there when the franchise is already in Singapore.) But nvm.... the Hot Chocolate from Starbucks was wonderful too!
Food! From cheng huan miao and Nan jing lu. Yes.... the shopping was so not worth it, but the food left me speechless and my stomach craving for more... and more and MORE! Oodles of Spicy-sour-sweet glass noodles from chen huan miao and fried xiao long pao that squirts the goodness of pork broth into your mouth with every bite. And they have Da long pao with the straws that allow you to suck the goodness of the broth, before you take a big bite! And sticks of fishballs, meatballs cooking in different broths at road side stands. The perfect snack for warming one up in cold weather. Ahhh..... (Nostalgia*)
Yep! Some more Food! Hairy crab from Ba cheng (Suzhou area) with Grand Sun Spa company. It was totally the company's treat! The crabs were off season by one month but this slip was negligible. Because the creamy white stuff and the rich crab roe occupied half the crab! Slightly below, Shanghai hotpot with an endless spread of marinated sweet meats (including sliced beef!) only for Singapore $10! A picture is worth a 1000 words and I have more than one picture. Just see for yourself.
Count-down to 2008 in my hotel room! After the hairy crabs, we traveled back to Shanghai and spent the countdown in my hotel room playing card games. There was no money involved so we all decided that the consequence for the loser of that round would have his/her face drawn. Yeah.... we've made a fool of ourselves.... =)
Qi Pu lu~ The fun but oh so dangerous local shopping district. Aha! The shopping finally started! From the buying of fake branded goods to bargaining for the 1/5th of the originally quoted price, we did our best to comb this place. But it was challenging and rather irritating because we were constantly hounded by touters trying to persuade us to 'visit' their store, which has 'everything' and it's 'totally fine, if we don't want to buy anything'. RUBBISH. There was a robbery just the day before when a reluctant tourist who agreed to visit one such store but left without buying anything; got robbed by the same bunch of people! Atrocious..... Sigh.... one has to be street smart and watch out constantly for one's belongings in this district. What an exciting experience!
hehehe....
Of course, locals would say that you've never visited Shanghai till you've visited Shanghai tan (The Pan). Behold, the famous skyline of Shanghai from its river bank. And the cruise.
Cruising on Huanglu jiang (River) We spent the entire hour freezing our asses off on the top deck for the sake of pictures and more pictures. I think I took more than 20 pictures of the same famous Pearl tower from different orientations. Sigh... the obssession with famous buildings has started. (Imagine my disappointment when I returned to Singapore... to a rather boring skyline.) Shanghai, it's your fault for taking my breath away....
I've got so much more to say..... but I don't have enough time. I do hope the pictures will suffice. Anyway... I really love Shanghai. Am so glad that I've ended 2007 on such a memorable note. =P
9:20 PM
